We're not supposed to take all this campy violence seriously, but the movie plays more stupid than funny and seeing it on a big I-Max screen in 3-D makes a bad movie worse by exaggerating its flaws.
The brother and sister from the fairy tale have been re-imagined as witch hunters looking to find lost children, captured and held by Famke Jannssen.
"Hansel & Gretel Witch Hunters" has sat on the shelf for a year while the studio figured out a good time to dump it on an unsuspecting public.
Jeremy Renner has become a big star since he made this movie so he's earned the right to be free of a movie like this, which for an actor and an audience is a form of imprisonment.
Jason Stratham is "Parker" - a crook with principals out for revenge against business associates who are even more unscrupulous than he is. Jennifer Lopez plays a real estate agent desperate to earn her 1st commission in tony Palm Beach.
I've liked his previous movies and underneath her J-Lo persona is a compelling actress. There are flashes of brilliance here, but both of them are trapped caught in a bad movie with not enough action and an adventure that too often makes no sense.
How bad is "Parker"? The studio releasing it gave us just two clips. I guess they figured the less said or shown about it, the better.
Another movie, a series of gags featuring celebrities like Hugh Jackman and Richard Gere, is apparently so bad the studio releasing "Movie 43" didn't want to show it to me.
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