How to talk to kids about natural disasters amid deadly fires in Southern California

The recent devastating fires in Southern California have left many families grappling with fear, uncertainty, and sadness.

The blaze, which has left 10 dead and many more injured so far, broke out amid dry and windy conditions, leaving officials scrambling to contain the historic destruction.

Children may be confused, scared, or overwhelmed by what they're hearing and seeing, and it's important for parents and caregivers to help them process these emotions.

Natural disasters whether fires, hurricanes, earthquakes, or floods can be deeply unsettling for children whether or not they are directly impacted. Their understanding of the world is still developing, and events like these can challenge their sense of safety and stability.

Here are some practical, research-backed ways to talk to children about natural disasters while keeping their emotional well-being and your own in mind.

Be honest, but keep it age-appropriate

Children don't need all the details, but they do need honesty. Dr. Tamar Kahane, licensed clinical psychologist and founder of The Kahane Center, an integrated mental health center providing comprehensive psychological and neuro-psychological services, emphasizes the importance of honesty while also validating children's fears.

"Start by acknowledging and validating their feelings and the reality. It is scary. It's not your job to pretend that everything is okay when it's not," she told "Good Morning America."

For younger kids, keep explanations simple and reassuring: "Fires are really scary and can be very dangerous, but thankfully, firefighters are working hard to put them out, and it's our job as your parent to keep you safe."

Older children may have more questions, answer them calmly and factually, but avoid overwhelming them with too much information. You can share and explain all the safety measures you have in place, Kahane said.

Trauma therapist Diane Lang advises tailoring answers to each child's maturity level.

"You want your answers to be very age-appropriate, knowing your child's maturity level. Keep it as simple as possible, and encourage them to ask any questions," she told "GMA."

If a question doesn't have an answer, it's okay to say, "I don't know, but we can learn about it together." This approach helps children feel supported while modeling problem-solving and curiosity in the face of uncertainty.

Validate their emotions

Natural disasters can bring up a range of emotions in children fear, sadness, anger or even confusion. Let them know it's okay to feel how they feel. Use phrases like, "It's normal to feel scared right now," or "It's understandable to feel upset about what's happening."

Kahane advises, "Parents often feel they need to protect their children from experiencing scary things, but it's more helpful to acknowledge their emotions. When children feel heard and understood, they are better able to cope."

She adds that regression like tantrums, clinginess, or whining is common under stress: "Keep in mind, 'under stress, regress.' Now is the time to hear them, hug them and understand where the acting out is coming from."

Lang emphasizes the importance of truly listening to children's fears: "You want to validate their feelings, listen to their fears and make sure they know you're listening," she said. "Eye contact is important, and you want to remind them that their feelings and concerns are completely normal and natural."

Validating emotions reassures children that their feelings are normal and that they're not alone.

Stick to routines

During times of uncertainty, routines provide children with a sense of stability.

Keeping bedtimes, meals and other daily rituals as consistent as possible helps reinforce predictability and security, even when life feels uncertain.

"Try and stick to their routines as much as you can," Kahane said. "This will help you and your child feel more safe and grounded. For older children try and make sure they maintain their academic and after school routines and social connections as best as possible."

Empower kids with action

When faced with events they can't control, children may feel helpless. Involve them in small, meaningful actions to give them a sense of control and contribution.

Andy Bozzo, Battalion Chief of Contra Costa County Fire Protection District and co-founder of Tablet Command, a mobile incident command and response solution, recommends practicing emergency preparedness at home as a way to empower children.

"Practice makes perfect," he told "GMA." "One of the fundamental elements of an emergency plan is practicing multiple escape routes from a home and a meeting place, once out of the house. Helping children gain confidence in their ability to escape a burning home is critical."

In addition to practicing escape plans, encourage children to take on small but meaningful roles in the process. For example, assign them a specific responsibility during a fire drill or evacuation, like grabbing the family's emergency kit or helping a younger sibling.

"Parents and children should practice together and become familiar with procedures, routes, and landmarks," Bozzo said. "Everyone, even children, should be empowered with a job or a role in that escape plan. Finally, a meeting place outside the home is paramount for accountability."

By practicing together, families can reduce the chaos and anxiety that often accompany real emergencies.

Other ways to get kids involved in the midst of a natural disaster are:

• By creating a family emergency plan together so they feel prepared.


• Writing thank-you notes or draw pictures for first responders.


• Exploring ways to help affected communities, like donating to relief efforts.

Limit media exposure

While it's important to stay informed, constant exposure to news coverage especially images or videos of destruction can increase fear and anxiety in children. Monitor what they're watching, and if possible, limit their exposure altogether.

"Children do not have the capacity to process these images emotionally. Too much exposure can flood them and lead to separation anxiety and other struggles," Kahane said.

Instead, focus on calming activities that help restore a sense of normalcy, such as family game nights, reading or creative projects.

Lang advises limiting not only children's media exposure but also how much the disaster is discussed within the family. "You want to limit their media exposure, as well as you and your spouse or other siblings talking about it too much around them," she said.

Take care of yourself too

It's hard to support a child when feeling overwhelmed. Make space to process your own emotions by talking to a friend, journaling or simply taking a moment to breathe.

Seeking support from other adults or community resources can also be beneficial.

Parents and caregivers don't need to have all the answers or say the perfect thing. Simply being present, listening, and offering comfort can make a significant difference for children.